It's that time of year again, when kids' dreams are written on paper and sent to that old jolly red-suited fellow. I've always wondered, how come Santa believes he has the right to judge the whole world in absolutes? And where does the line between naught and nice lay? Is Santa Claus a pacifist, or does Santa believe in redemptive violence? How does Santa feel about the major issues in today's society, such as abortion or the war in Iraq? Santa himself isn't flawless I'm sure, so how can he possibly be fit to define what is good and what is bad. Doesn't breaking and entering count as naughty? I think so Santa, I think so.